To eat well in England, you should have a breakfast three times a day.

Sunday 21 March 2010

Prince Philip Kills Womble

HRH Duke of Edinburgh has been criticised by animal rights organisations after the carcass of a womble was discovered at the Queen's Balmoral Estate last Thursday morning. 


The womble, believed to have been part of a pack introduced to the area during Margaret Thatcher's 'Tidy up Scotland' initiative in the 1980s, was discovered by a group of ramblers, who later alerted the RSPCA.

Phillip, a keen cross bow enthusiast, has denied killing the animal, but a royal aide has since revealed that it isn't the first time the Prince has been suspected of killing one of the protected species. 'If truth be told, he fucking hates wombles', said the unnamed employee. 'He's been known to kill several in one afternoon and even has a pair of wombleskin moccasins, which he wears whilst watching the snooker or eating Fois Gras.

It is the second time that a member of the Royal family has come under fire for animal cruelty in as many months. Prince Harry was recently forced to make a formal apology to the Donkey Sanctuary following a visit to Blackpool where he was overheard making comments which were deemed offensive to donkeys, women and the Dutch.

Terry Nutkins has refused to comment